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INSIDE THE MIND OF SUICIDE:

4 AM

I am stuck in a dream

Don’t want to leave so I refuse to scream

I tripped and fell into a new life,

screaming because someone has a knife.

Don’t fret, just your imagination

You’ve made a fabulous creation

The grass grows long so you lay

Wishing you’d fade away

You don’t want to leave this sleep,

because you don’t want to weep.

So you wish and pray

that you won’t wake up the next day

I am stuck in a dream

JW

Our identity is important to all of us; such as, who are we and what is our purpose? The adolescent years is when we begin to form our personal identities and build on our self-concept and self-esteem. These years are crucial to an adolescent development because it is important to have a sense of who you are and what your morals are.

Virtually all teenagers become increasingly concerned about other’s opinions, but those who are overly dependent on social acceptance and approval from their peers, place their self-worth “on the line” (Harter & Whitesell, 2003). This can be hazardous to an adolescent’s self-worth because they are searching for acceptance and validation from other people instead of within themselves. Teenagers who rely on other’s opinions to fuel their own self-identity may end up feeling depressed. Establishing a strong self-identity throughout the adolescent years is necessary for normal development through relationships, morality, and a sense of worth.

This is the time in their young lives when they are trying to figure out who they are.  They may act differently while hanging out with certain friends or with different social groups, than they do when they are at home with their family.  These conflicting feelings of who they really are and who they are supposed to be may confuse them. They have not yet learned the necessary coping skills an adult may have to deal with these contradicting behaviors of self-concept. This may be dangerous to their self-worth.

As adults we know that self-concept is fluid, and that it is okay to change a little bit based on different situations or environments. For example, one may not behave the same at work as they do at a party with their best friend. We mold our self-identities slightly based on the appropriateness of the situation. Because self-identity is so new to teenagers, they are still learning how to navigate this and it may be sensitive to them.

BE PATIENT WITH YOURSELF

TELLING FRIENDS AND FAMILY SHE’S GONE

When my daughter died, I remember making a mental list in my head of everyone I knew.  I wanted to call everyone within the first few days, with the horrible news that my daughter had taken her life, at the young age of fourteen years old; she was only a Freshman in high school.

Looking back now, I think I wanted to get it out-of-the-way and be done with the dread of having to make these ghastly phone calls.  I knew I had to do it, after all, I was her mom, but it was one of the hardest things to do, calling all our friends, family, and acquaintances.

As hard as it was emotionally, it allowed me the allotted time and it was under my terms.  I didn’t want to be surprised later, when I wasn’t emotionally prepared to deal with the conversations of “how’s Jewels doing?”  This indorsed me to take back the control in a situation where all my control had been taken away from me.

Did I remember everyone?  Pretty much, but I did forget one person on my mental list and to this day, I haven’t told him, and it’s been a little over a year now since she’s been gone.  I like to pretend she’s still here when he asks about her.

I’ll need to tell him eventually.  We don’t see each other too often, but it’s kind of nice having one friend who doesn’t look at me with sad eyes and I can pretend, just for an hour, to be the person I used to be before Jewels’ suicide.

Although society, media, and family stress the point that the Holidays are “happy”, not everyone may feel this sense of joy.  For many of us, the holidays are a time of stress, loneliness, and loss.  We may be missing someone who has passed on or left us.

Remember to surround yourself with people who love you.  Stay away from toxic relationships and situations.

Stay good to your body; take care of yourself by eating healthy, drinking plenty of water, and exercising.

Stay good to your mind by listening to yourself, being patient with your emotions / feelings, and doing things that are good for you.

We may not always feel “happy”, but patience and accepting your feelings as they come, is good advice.  Trying to avoid them or pretend they don’t exist my be toxic for your mind and body.

Stay true to yourself, you are worth it!

The Jewels’ Angels Foundation wants to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas and the happiest of Holidays to all.

Thank you for all your support during this year, helping us with our fight to ending teen depression and spreading awareness on suicide.

We look forward to even more progress during the new year in 2018.  We won’t stop our fight on suicide awareness / prevention, until no child or adult has to suffer with the horrible feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness, helplessness, and self-hate.

We love you and remember…YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

The Jewels’ Angels Foundation is sponsoring a toy drive in our local community of Corona, CA.

During the last week before Christmas, we are collecting new unwrapped toys and clothes for children /teens, ranging from ages between 1 month to 18 years old.

Saturday December 23rd we will donate these items to the Parent Center and Corona Mission for them to distribute amongst the families who are financially struggling this year.

The Jewels’ Angels Foundation wishes to make this Christmas a happier time for our families in need during this holiday season.

Please contact us directly through e-mail or send us a private message to obtain the location to drop off your gift.

Thank you for supporting our cause to make this world a better place and help to end teen depression and spread awareness on suicide.

WALK OUT OF DARKNESS – SPONSORED BY THE AMERICAN FOUNDATION FOR SUICIDE PREVENTION (AFSP)

This past Saturday, December 2, 2017, we were invited to attend the Walk Out of Darkness, sponsored by the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, held in Upland, CA.  Donations supported research, education & prevention, advocacy & public policy, and support for survivors of suicide loss and people at risk to help spread the awareness and prevention of suicide.

It was a great experience for us personally and a tremendous recognition for our foundation.  We even got our own booth, as you can see in our picture.

It was their 8th year of hosting the walk, and the purpose of it was not only to raise money for suicide prevention and awareness strategies, but to also honor a loved one lost from suicide.  Every single walker had experienced some loss from suicide, or greatly supported suicide prevention efforts.  It was very sad, but also beautiful to see so many people affected by suicide all together and the ability to connect and share our experiences together, as well as explain our foundation and what we do.

It was a great turnout; we ran out of our patchwork bears within the first hour, gave away tons of pens and cards.  We also reached out to many people and shared with them what our foundation does and when to come to our support groups if needed.  Our booth featured two paintings done by us representing suicide awareness and our foundation, and a collage of Jewels.

On a personal level, it was sad to see so many people hurting over something we know is extremely painful.  It was an emotionally exhausting day, to say the least; however it is all worth it in the end.  The goal and recognition to spread awareness about suicide, and provide our own services through the Jewels’ Angels Foundation makes all the emotions worth it; if we only save one life, it was worth it!

The top sponsor spotlight was the Loma Linda University Behavioral Medical Center.  Their goal is in recognizing the complex needs of patients facing mental illness and chemical dependency.

The next walk is schedule for Saturday March 24, 2018 at Palm Desert Civic Center Park, in Coachella Valley, CA – and yes we will be there with a booth giving away Patchwork Bears with the suicide awareness ribbon and pens.

Register at afsp.org/inlandempiredc

If someone you know is in crisis, call the 24-hour hotline at The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline:  1-800-273-8255

Sponsored sites:

Loma Linda Behavioral Medical Center

AFSP

Sometimes it seems that all this country thinks about is what they do not have. What they are missing, what they wish they had, and what they could have if they would have done this or that differently.

While these thoughts may be hard to get rid of completely, there is a way for us to better think about our lives. Try thinking positively about your life; instead of focusing on what we wish we had, instead focus on what we do have.

What are you grateful for? If we take the time to think about what we are grateful for in our own worlds it can greatly increase the positivity of our daily mindset.

I  am grateful for:

-My family, my health, my apartment, my car, my intelligence, my pets, my job, my determination, and my strength; just to name a few!

These are large things in my life that I am grateful for. Even consciously thinking about the little things we take for granted can make a big difference.

Subsequently, putting into our awareness the things we aimlessly take for granted, that not everyone may possess. Maybe its being able to walk, or being able to get an education.

Make a conscious effort to put into the forefront of your mind the things you DO have and the happiness and strength you DO possess.

Friendship plays a huge role in human development. During early childhood, the experience of socializing with friends and making connections with other human beings is vital to a child’s self-esteem, emotional development, growth of social skills, problem solving skills, and many other concepts. Friendships can also work to help children develop and discover their self-identities, as they move into adolescence. Simply having a friend provides a person one can rely on, share their ideas and problems, and be there to support each other through life’s good and bad times.

Having a friend is extremely important to adolescents because it gives them someone to connect with and someone who they can talk to about things they may both be experiencing. Transitioning from childhood to adolescence is an awkward and confusing time and friends can be a source of similarity. Talking to a friend about your transitioning phase, such as puberty, and having commonalities helps expand an adolescent’s confidence and helps them to understand that other teens are going through the same hurdles. Friendship also provide a sense of belonging and security in the teenage world.

Remember to be kind to one another. If someone is sitting alone at lunch, maybe try sitting with them and sparking up a conversation. If someone looks lost, walk up to them and ask if they need help getting somewhere. Humans by nature are social creatures, and everyone can benefit from some friendly conversation. Be understanding and respectful; lend a helping hand or simply offer some kind words to a stranger this week. Little moments can make a tremendous difference in a person’s life!