OUR VOICE MATTERS
“My Voice Matters” is such a cliché. This phrase has been overused, but what does it really mean? It is a powerful phrase that must be heard.
“My Voice Matters” means that we will no longer tolerate disrespect. It means that we will no longer be dismissed. It means that we will no longer be silenced. We all matter and what we say matters. If I have something to say, you won’t tell me to be quiet. If I have something to say, you won’t walk away from me in conversation. If I have something to say, you won’t silence me with a door slamming in my face. If I have something to say, you won’t belittle me with your words of logic.
Our voice matters because we matter. Our opinions matter while engaging in intellectual conversations and if you don’t agree with me, that’s okay, but don’t shut me up. You cannot silence us.
As children, we are taught that our voices don’t matter. We learn that this is okay and we allow other people to silence us. Maybe silence is a little strong, perhaps a better adjective would be “to dismiss”. I think dismissed is the perfect adjective.
We allow people to dismiss us all the time. This is not okay.
We have learned to be soft-spoken while speaking. Perhaps this stems from a condition of not being heard. Speaking in a soft-spoken raises our voices up an octave while softening our tone, as if our opinion and knowledge doesn’t matter. However, are we merely allowing others to dismiss us, speaking without conviction? It is almost as if we are expecting to be dismissed, silenced, walked away from and anticipating rejection with the changing of our voice.
Consequently, perhaps we were programmed to accept this, but I am here to tell you that we absolutely do not have to accept this. Next time you are speaking while being dismissed, strengthen your voice, lower it an octave, speak with confidence and a strong commitment. At first you won’t see a change because we are the only ones responsible for changing our own behaviors by setting boundaries. We cannot change others or make them accept our boundaries or changes in our behavior, but what we can do is control our own behaviors by setting our boundaries and then waiting.
Change doesn’t come overnight. Some people in our circle will respect our new set of boundaries, but others will not. Only we are in control of our own destiny, not anyone else. Self-respect and love for ourselves is so much more important than keeping someone in our lives that doesn’t respect the boundaries we set for ourselves or accept that our voice matters.
Our voice does matter. What we have to say is important. The point is that nobody has the right to silence you in any way. We are all uniquely and equally important. Our home and workplace is our safe space, a place where we are loved, safe from harm, and able to use our voice without retaliation.
Home is a place of vulnerability. A place where we can be ourselves. A place where we are heard. Never let anyone take that from you or make you believe that they are more important than your own voice. This is simply not true. You matter and your voice matters. Speak up, speak loud and never give up on what you have to say. The silence has no voice, but you do.
If you or someone you know is struggling with thoughts of suicide or suicidal ideations, you are not alone. Reach out to friend, family member, mentor, or text 988 to speak to a counselor who can help you. You are never alone and you matter.
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