AN EMPTY SEAT
September is Suicide Awareness & Prevention month. What does this mean? It means that it is all up to us to be aware of those around us and assess their behaviors, words, and patterns. Be extra kind to all, especially those who are displaying low energy, depression, anxiety, agitation, or sudden changes in their normal behavior, character, and personality. It is up to us to provide an additional dose of awareness to prevent suicidal actions or attempts, preventing the feeling of being alone, isolated, and not heard.
An empty seat…what does it mean to you? Are you a teen struggling with life’s challenges or an adult struggling in the work force? Wherever you are, is there an empty seat? It’s not just an empty seat. It is where your best friend sits, your co-worker, your boss, your teacher, your student, it can be anyone.
You have noticed subtle changes in their behavior or actions. The seat used to be filled with their presence, but you’ve noticed more and more their absence. The last time you saw them, they snapped at you, which is unlike them. This is not their normal characteristic. They’ve been struggling to keep up with their assignments when they are normally the one who helps you, but when you offer to help them, they graciously decline with the statement, “that’s okay, it doesn’t matter anyway.” Somehow, that statement makes your stomach drop, but you don’t know why.
You have noticed a change in their appearance and hygiene. You’ve noticed drastic weight gain or weight loss and differences in their eating habits. You’ve commented on their clothing choices of wearing long sleeve sweatshirts and jeans in the hotter months; however, their comments stated that they are cold or raise their shoulders that it isn’t a big deal. You notice the subtle ways they cover themselves up when looked at too intently, shifting their gaze.
You can’t help but noticing them withdrawing from normal activities they used to enjoy, making excuses when asked to hang out, and complaining more about physical ailments, such as stomach aches, headaches, or just too tired. You have noticed that they say all too much, that they are just tired.
The empty seat has now grown to be the empty seat in the car, the empty seat at the dinner table, the empty seat at the park, an empty seat in their bedroom, an empty seat in your life.
You wish you had noticed the warning signs to suicide when it had been just an empty seat. You wished you asked, “I have noticed you haven’t seemed yourself lately. I’ve missed hanging out with you. I have noticed you’ve been absent and withdrawing (or whatever the circumstance) from activities. Sometimes when people experience things like that, they might be thinking of suicide. Are you thinking of suicide?”
By knowing the warning signs to suicide, suicide awareness can help to prevent suicide, filling that empty seat with their existence, instead of a memory of who they were, but with who they are and will be.
If you or someone you know is showing signs of suicide, having thoughts or ideations, there are resources to help:
Suicide Prevention Resource Center
Take Action for Mental Health
Make the Connection – Support for Veterans
The Trevor Project – Support for LGBTQ youth
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
1-800-273-TALK, or text 988
Resources for those who have lost someone to suicide:
Survivors After Suicide Program
Friends for Survival
American Association of Suicidology
American Association of Suicidology – Together, We Will Make An Impact!
The Jewels' Angels Foundation, Inc. 
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